An HR Joke for the Small Business Owner

I got this one from the Guillaume International News Service:

A man owned a small farm in Indiana. The Indiana State Wage & Hour Department claimed he was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to interview him.

“I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them,” demanded the agent.

“Well,” replied the farmer, “there’s my farm hand who’s been with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board. The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her $150 per week plus free room and board. Then there’s the half-wit who works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.”

“That’s the guy I want to talk to….the half-wit,” says the agent.

“That would be me,” replied the farmer.

I know the feeling. I’m an HR farmer.

10 Holiday Rules for HR to Keep in Mind

The holidays aren’t always the happiest of seasons for everyone. In fact, HR should keep on its toes during these days. I’ve seen several articles about holiday parties and how to watch out for the legal implications. But I think that Pax’s Dos and Dont’s for the Holiday Season takes the cake as a cautionary tale from the frontlines. Here are a few examples:

  • Do not ask me, “Got all your holiday shopping done?”: I will twist your head off at the neck if you do this.
  • Please don’t tell me how hard it is to stick to your diet during the holidays. : It still does not explain why you eat like a pig the other three hundred and sixty some days of the year.
  • Just because there is a holiday luncheon at work, don’t expect me to come to it: Frankly, I can’t stand these “forced” cheer events. It’s not that I don’t like my co-workers, I am just antisocial (of course if the event is being held at a four star restaurant, or if it gets me out of the office for the day, I might reconsider).

Forewarned is forearmed. You’ve been warned.

Hint to Management: Never, Ever Sing in Videos

If you’re in management and have the urge to sing in a video, don’t do it unless your name is Bono or Pavarotti (well, Bono). Senior managers are managers, and talent is talent. Know the difference, guys.

Bank of America Managers Butcher “One” (via Flip Chart Fairy Tales)

Singapore Media Development Managers Rap (via TechCrunch)

If you’re in senior management and feel the need to make a creative video, think about doing an Elf Yourself. At least it’s good comedy.

Unique Isn’t Always What It’s Cracked Up to Be

Unique

In case anyone confuses “unique” with valuable.

NB: I’m sorry I don’t know the original source of this. Is it Despair, Inc? If anyone knows, please send me a note or leave a comment and I’ll do a proper citation. I didn’t come up with this myself.

A Few Good Creative Men

This movie remake of A Few Good Men into A Few Good Creative Men is making the rounds and really cracked me up. For any of you who have worked with creatives this one’s well worth watching.

[via SwissMiss]

← Previous Page — Next Page →