It Pays to Be a Slacker

The corollary to “performance is punishing” is “it pays to be a slacker.” What got me going on this line of thinking was, once again, Jessica Hagy’s incisiveness on Indexed. When I saw A and B Are also True Colors, it made me think about levels of performance and associated payouts. About pay for performance. Or, more importantly, pay for just-a-little-less-than good performance.

Doing the Work vs. Taking Credit for the Work

Source: Indexed

Do Just a Little Less Than Average. Get Ahead.

Here’s the rub in undisciplined pay-for-performance systems: It’s a good idea, an economically justifiable one, to do just a little less than average. C-minus work. (What do they call the person who graduates at the bottom of his medical school class? Doctor.) It’s being the person who milks the system. And sick days. The person who pretends to help, but misses deadlines. Who’s nowhere to be found during the project, but is front-and-center when the team is feted. (No wonder “feted” and “fetid” are homonyms.) It’s the person who gets an “average” raise.

The reality of many pay-for-performance programs is that slightly-below-average performers and get average raises. Let’s talk turkey:

Below-Average Joe Works 46 Weeks a Year
Joe’s salary is for 52 weeks of work. He takes 4 weeks of vacation (every single day he’s due), is sick for two weeks (about once a month!), and takes twice as long to complete tasks as Jane Above-Average. Joe works 46 weeks at best, and that doesn’t factor in his inefficiency.

Above-Average Jane Works 60 Weeks a Year
Jane’s salary is for 52 weeks of work. But Jane works at least one day on the weekend, takes no more than two of her 4-week vacation allotment (reluctantly and after much cajoling), works on her sick days, and is half-again as efficient as her peers. Jane works 60 weeks (50 weekend days = 10 weeks).

When performance reviews, merit pay and bonus time rolls around, Joe ends up with a C-minus, and Jane ends up with a B. (Because no one in Acme Coffee & Creamer ever gets an A.) Joe gets a 3% pay increase, and Jane gets a 4% increase. Who’s happier?

Why It Pays to Be A Below-Average Joe

If Joe and Jane both made $50,000 at the start of the year, and Joe gets a 3% raise, his new pay is $51,500, an increase of $1,500. Jane’s 4% raise results in a new pay of $52,000 annually, an increase of $2,000. The difference between what Joe worked and what Jane worked is 14 weeks a year. So, for an additional $500 in merit pay, Jane worked 14 weeks. At an average of 40 hours a week, Jane worked 560 more hours than Joe. And the incremental pay that she earned beyond Below-Average Joe’s modest effort? $8.92 an hour. Above-Average Jane worked a ton more than Below-Average Joe, all for less than $10/hr. Who’s happier? Joe.

Joe got to go on vacation. Joe didn’t worry. Joe didn’t have to do a heckuva lot to get his piece of the merit pie. Joe thinks that 500 bucks is worth having all those days off, and the lowered stress of no worries and no output.

Good News for Slackers — No One Will Do Anything About It

Being a C-minus employee has its financial rewards: Do less, get more. The disturbing thing is that high performers hate working around slackers. But slackers, the Below-Average Joes, are pretty safe. Research done by Leadership IQ shows that “93% of employees say that working with a low performer has decreased their productivity. But only 14% of senior executives say their company effectively manages low performers. And only 17% of middle managers say they feel comfortable improving or removing low performers.” It’s a self-reinforcing state. Slack a little, get a decent raise. Slack some more, you’re probably pretty safe. All of this is predicated, of course, on the idea that slacking, for the lack of a better word, is good.

Slackers Be Gone

It might pay to be a slacker, but what companies must do is to make slackers feel the financial pain of living in Slackerdom. We all do what we get reinforced to do. If we get rewarded for being a slacker, and performance is punishing, what will we do? (Yes, let’s all say it together: “People aren’t motivated by money.” BS. I mean, Achooo!) They’ll slack. So how do we turn it around, to make slackers be gone? You’ll have to stay tuned. But I can tell you right now, it’s not about performance reviews any more than daily driving is about holding the wheel in the exact same position for the whole trip.

About the Author

Frank Roche

Frank started IFRACTAL over 7 years ago with Sarah Chambers. Together, they've created HR communications and HR software for some of the world's leading companies. Frank is also studying Flamenco guitar and origami.

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